Recognizing Our Struggle With Self-Control

Developing self-control is one of the hardest things that anyone can do? Is there a way to gain control in our lives? 

Recognizing Our Struggle With Self-Control

“Self-Control – Choosing to do what you should do, and not what you want to do.” Upward Sports

James 1 19b – “Everyone should be quick to listen. But they should be slow to speak. They should be slow to get angry.”

Two of my favorite restaurants growing up were Golden Corral and Cici’s pizza. We did not go out to eat very often and when we did, the hungry boy in me came out. My mom would tease me about having hollow legs. Jonathan, my twin brother and I would have competitions to see how much food we could eat.

I think my record at Cici’s was about 18-20 slices of pizza and about 5 plates at Golden Corral (We affectionately called it, the Golden Trough). When it came to food. I had no idea what it meant to slow down and not eat as much. I did not have any self-control in that area. To this day, I have a hard time passing on a slice of pizza or ice cream.


Self-control is an area in life that we all struggle with, just in different ways. We all have success with control in areas of our lives. We get up for work and get dressed. As parents we are forced to learn self-control with changing diapers, puke, and taking care of our children.

But we often struggle with the following: eating too much, not exercising (me), watching too much TV, attached to media, or getting angry at coworker, drivers, spouses and even our children. It is so hard to put our breaks on and say NO.

Proverbs 25:16 “If you find honey, eat just enough. If you eat too much of it, you will throw up.”

The meaning of this verse is pretty obvious, don’t eat too much and have self-control.

In football we hear the phrase “Mind over matter.”

Regaining self-control in our lives has to be about what is best for all.

Sometimes the best decision is the hardest decision to make. Making a budget and keeping it is hard. Putting limits on your food intake and exercising is rough. Not lashing out at your spouse or children in anger can be the toughest but most rewarding thing you can do.

When I am in a situation where I want to let things go, it is helpful for me to think about the other person and what my end goal is.

I had to be talked down from having a heated conversation a few months back. I was super mad and could have said anything. But I had wise people who spoke into my life and told me to take a step back and let God control the situation instead of me. In this case it was wise counselors in my life that helped me have control. And I am very glad that I listened.

Each one of us has areas in our lives that are a constant struggle.

Think through some ways that you can look at the end goal and the people involved.

Here are some areas that people struggle with self-control:

– Eating
– Exercising
– Language
– Anger
– Our words
– Our spending
– Media Consumption
– Pornography (Destroys countless families)
– Adultery (Destroys countless families)

Here are a few questions to help guide you as you make decisions:

How will this decision affect me?
How will this decision affect others?
Can I take a step back before reacting?
Do I have time to sleep on it?
What would this benefit me?
Can this hurt me?
What is keeping me from having self-control in this area?
What do I struggle having self-control with the most?

Ask God to give you the strength to have self-control in your life.

Why is developing self-control hard to do? How do you develop self-control in your life?

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